The Troubadour: The Summer 2018 Photo Album of Random Space Center Shots Presents: A New Magellan Navigation System, Jon Parker's UnKempt State (Shocking), The New Staff Shirt and the Rude Way it was Modeled. The Space Center's New Pharmacy Open for Business. The New Lanyards and of Course

Summer 2018 Space Centers Photo Album
An Album of photographs taken here, there, and nearly everywhere someone would stop and pose. I travelled far and wide, visiting the Space Centers doing my best to catch the staff and volunteers in their natural habitats doing what they normally do - only more of it due to the randomness of my visits.

A Random Stop at the Christa McAuliffe Space Center
Central Elementary, Pleasant Grove
June 27, 2018

I attempted to sneak into the Magellan Control Room undetected. My plans were thwarted by James Porter's Big Brother Security Camera Surveillance and Monitoring System. There are cameras everywhere. Walk into the school and you're spotted. Using the latest face recognition software under license from the Chinese Security Service - experts in Surveillance as they would be with the task of holding the communist regime in power - James can spot you, scan you, determine your blood type, pull up your police record, and on a good day with a clear shot, give you the number of cavities boring through your teeth's enamel.

Needless to say, I was spotted. The element of surprise lost. The staff and volunteers were seated, posed, appropriately busy, and perfectly smiled. Regardless, I walked in and took the shot.

What surprised me was Jon Parker's neglected condition. Just look at this poor assistant director, hunched over his keyboard, focused on his mission, semi-delirious, dribble finding its way from the corner of his mouth to the front of his staff shirt. The poor man - so busy with private missions and camps that he hasn't the time to see to his personal needs. Look at the state of his hair! While I would give my back teeth and the last $10.00 from my savings account to have hair like his it just can't be. Sadly deforestation and an infestation of pine beetles have thinned my once lush forest of hair into a landscape of shrub oak and tumbleweed. I offered to cut it while he flew his mission. A deep guttural growl stop me dead in my tracks. I dropped the scissors and back away slowly.

The Magellan staff and volunteers were clever and, using Constellation font, wrote the name of the simulator above the flight station. I think it adds a nice touch.

What's really special is what's underneath. We know how the crew of the Magellan struggle with directions especially when navigating their simulator successfully through a mission. Well, to make things easier, the staff painted a map of the easier constellations directly above them. That way, if needed, the second chair (or a tall volunteers with a good sense of direction) can track the crew in space through their mission using a thumbtack.
"Computer, where are we?" the captain asks.
"Quick where are they," Jon asks.
Lissa glances up, "They're two inches from Gemini."
Jon as the computer, "The ship is two inches from Gemini."

You see, the Magellan's new navigation system is flawless in design and efficiency - a model all simulators should follow.

Matt Robinson Models the Christa McAuliffe Space Center's New Staff Shirt

Now don't you wish you owned one of these classy new shirts? Sorry, you won't find them on any store shelve or online. Amazon eat your heart out. WalMart, give it a rest. These shirts are issued to the few, the proud, the deserving staff of the CMSC. Not even I, the founder and former director, can weasel one from James Porter.

Knowing that, Mr. Matt Robinson gave me a smile for the record books. He could see envy written across my face.

The Space Center's New Pharmacy is Open

The Christa McAuliffe Space Center has a new pharmacy located in Mr. James Porter's office. Where as before you needed to look in all the proper hiding places to find that bag of M&Ms, now the pill dispensaries are on the wall in plain site for all the ship's doctors to find. Where are the child proof safeguards? Does the State of Utah know about this? What about Starfleet Medical? I don't think we need to worry about the authorities. They'll walk in, take a look at the pills, then see that picture pasted above and without further questions, issue a license to dispense controlled substances.

The Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center has a New Lanyard

And just when you thought this post hit rock bottom in the relevant news category we dig a bit deeper and show the world the new lanyards in use at the Space Center.