Things You'll Never Hear Spoken at the Space Center in a Billion Million Years. A Blast from the Past. Also, This Week's Imaginarium Theater.

 Hello Troops,

     It has been a quiet week at the Space Centers so I thought I'd repost something I wrote in February 2009.  It is called "Things You'll Never Hear Spoken at the Space Center in a Million Billion Years."  I added comments (in purple) to add a bit of background to help you understand the sarcasm.   
     Let's make an updated version of this for 2024.  Take a minute and send me something for a current member of staff or a volunteer at any of the Space Centers.  I'll gather them up and make a new post for the staff and volunteers today.  

Ad Astra!
Mr. Williamson 

The Staff Back in the Day at an Honor's Night

Sorry for the blurry picture. Who do you remember?

THINGS YOU’LL NEVER HEAR SPOKEN AT THE SPACE CENTER IN A MILLION BILLION YEARS.
February 2009.

Mark Daymont: "We're going to do a different mission today in the Magellan. No Death Trap
today!"
Mark loved that mission. It was his go to story for the overnight camps. The staff and volunteers were a bit tired of it though.  

Bill Schuler: “That was a great story on first reading. No further editing is required. Your story is good to be told. What skill, what writing. You are a credit to your family and nation. A new Ernest Hemmingway.”
Bill was my first line of defense when someone wanted to run a new mission by me.  He was the editor in chief and brutal with his red pen.  

Dave Daymont: “Thank you for calling me at the last second and asking me to take another Phoenix mission. I had plans to do something else but last minute missions are my specialty. Golly I’m lucky.”
You never called Dave in for a last minute booking. Never!

Mr. Williamson: “If you’re going to Harts please pick me up a bottled water. One must watch one’s health. Don’t you agree?”
My philosophy is simple, water is for bathing and Dt. Dew is for drinking. Keep 'em coming

Aleta Clegg: “Perikoi is my best mission. I’m so excited when I get to tell it to our visiting sixth grade classes.”
Aleta wore many hats at the Space Center: office manager, flight director, summer camp kitchen manager, etc.  Both Aleta and I were so done with Perikoi that field trip season!

Lorraine Houston: “I brought a cake from WalMart’s bakery. They are so much better than anything I can do at home. You know me in the kitchen - all thumbs I’m afraid. Well, thumbs and a bit of blood if you let me near the knifes.”
Lorraine was the staff and volunteer's mom away from home. She brought home baked goodies to the overnight camp and everyone got a home made birthday cake on their birthdays.  

Metta Smith: “Please leave those shirts untucked. I mean right now! Don’t you make me come over there and untuck it for you. Listen all of you, you’ll get the sharp edge of my tongue if you don’t listen to me.”
Metta strictly enforced the "shirts tucked in" policy.  She wasn't known for lectures to the staff. That was Megan's job :)

Megan Warner: “ Please lean back in the chairs. Please leave your personal belongings in my Control Room and Briefing Room.”
Megan is a flight director today at The Space Place and the Discovery Space Center at American Heritage School.  You don't bring personal items into the Control Rooms and never lean back in a chair.  

Megan Warner: “Hello Children, this is our transporter room. Aren’t we excited? I can see it in your eyes you little darling. Now, we are all going to go into this room and wait for the transporter sound. You will be magically transported to the Phoenix waiting for you way up there in the sky. Also, be sure to touch the walls when you go in. There will be a shock but well worth the experience. Everyone in. Isn’t this fun? Are we all ready? “
​You boarded the Phoenix Megan's way or no way at all.  Got it!

Bradyn Lystrup: “Shadows is my mission. I own Shadows. I’ve always owned Shadows. Did I mention it was MY mission. Yes, I’m all that and more.”
Bradyn works at Canyon Grove Academy in Pleasant Grove and runs the school's InfiniD Mission Program on their Starship Everest.  Shadows is still HIS mission if you ask him today.  

Kyle Herring: “OK, I finished everything on the repair list. The Space Center is in tip top shape."
Kyle still hasn't finished everything on the 2009 repair list.

Christine G: “I’m so depressed. Nothing works right. I can’t get through this. Oh the humanity. I’m going to lay down right here on the control room floor and sleep. I can’t cope. I can’t go on.”
Christine is the most optimistic person I've ever met.  She found the good in every mission, even if the Odyssey was falling apart around her. 

Rachel H: “Me too”
Rachel was a close 2nd to Christine

Stacy Carroll: “I know I’m early to work. It shouldn’t surprise you. I’m what’s known as a morning person. I thrive in the morning. I’m awake before dawn busy as a bee.”
Stacy was not a morning person, but nobody flew the Galileo as well as she.  She was an excellent flight director trainer as well. 

Sheila Powell: “I’ve never met a child I didn’t like. Children are angels. If they are disrespectful in class its my fault. I must not be doing the right things to entertain them. Children can’t be expected to show self control. Its not in their nature.”
Saint Sheila was a saint. She loved children and expected them to behave during the field trip lesson time.

Bill Schuler: “Please let me offer you my work space here in the Briefing Room. I’m working at the school today but see you need a place to work yourself. I’m perfectly willing to work right here beside you on the floor. I only need a little corner and access to electricity. If there is anything else I can do to make you more comfortable at my desk please don’t hesitate to ask.”
You never messed with Bill's stuff  or encroached on his working area.  Expect a bit of Diet Coke in your hair if you did.

Kyle Herring: “I’m changing my hair style to something more natural for my age. I think I’m going for a Victor Williamson hair cut. It has worked well for him for the last 50 years so learn from the best - that’s what I always say.”
Kyle did his best to look as young as possible with his hair. 

Victor Williamson: “Wasn’t that fun having me spend the entire overnight camp in your ship watching you fly. I learned so much. This week I plan on spending all my free time in the simulators watching mission after mission after mission. I just can’t get enough. Hey everybody, let’s get together and discuss your mission ideas as well.”
Watching new flight directors fly (or want to be flight directors) was torture for me.  It took all my strength not to reach over and take the microphone forcefully from their hands and fly the mission myself. 

Warren N.: “Socialism is the only real form of government. The government has a responsibility to care for the weak and lazy. We all need a rock solid safety net under us for hard times.”
Warren was the staff's number 2 Republican in all things. 

Kyle Herring: “Ditto”
Kyle was the first. 

Jace (Central): ‘silence’
Jace was a Central School sixth grade volunteer. They sat in the Control Rooms and listened to the political debates. 

Brock B: “Mr. Williamson, I’d love to spend more time in the Magellan but you keep putting me in the Voyager. Please can I get to do what I want to do sometime?”
Brock was one of the those "Voyager Boys". They had their own gang and never left the Voyager unless I forced them to. 

Spencer M: “I’m nothing. I worthless. I’m the worst player on my church ball team. I don’t know why they put up with me. If I could only make one basket. Oh what’s the use?”
Spencer Merryweather was the best at everything. All you had to do was ask him if you had any doubt.  

Spenser D: “I really enjoy all the kids you send into the Voyager to work with me. They are so full of life and energy. It makes my day to get to train them how to do the acting parts. I get a kick out of the cute things they say. Oh, and if they refuse to do what I say as Supervisor, I’ll forgive them because, after all, they are just kids. We can’t expect them to accept responsibility and the value of a job well done, can we?”
Spenser Dauwalder was another of those "Voyager Boys".  He was a bit unforgiving when it came to crew misbehavior.  

Mr. Williamson: “The best part of my job is dealing with personality issues. I love to mediate conflict between staff and volunteers. I thrive on staff misunderstandings. I get a kick out of ironing out the petty issues that arise from any organization staffed with multiple humans.”
Mr. Porter has to deal with these now. :)

Yes my friends, those are things you’ll never, ever hear spoken at the Space Center.

Now let’s have a great week at school, at work, and at home. Remember, the Space Center is a home to all of us. Let’s work hard to help it achieve its potential and an influence for good and learning not only for the students but our staff and volunteers as well.

Mr. Williamson

Imaginarium Theater

The Week's Best Videos From Around the World Edited for a Gentler Audience

Megan Warner to Work at American Heritage School's Discovery Space Center. Bill Schuler, the Man Behind the Space Center Display Case. Imaginarium Theater

Megan Warner to Become American Heritage School's Starship Discovery Field Trip Coordinator 

     Megan Warner was hired last week to flight direct the daytime in school Starship Discovery field trips for the students at American Heritage School in American Fork.  She will be working alongside Alex DeBirk, the Discovery Space Center's Director.  Lately, Alex has been burning the candle from both ends as he tries to keep up with both his responsibilities at the school; teaching high school physics and directing the space center.  
     With her new duties at American Heritage, Megan will be the only duel space center flight director.  She has been working with Bracken Funk at The Space Place at Renaissance Academy for past few years both supervising and flight directing the Voyager.  She is also working to refit the small trailer starship Nighthawk at The Space Place.  
      I've worked with Megan for the past 15 plus years (I've lost count). She started as a volunteer at the Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center as a young teen and worked her way up to supervisor, flight director, set director, and center director for one year before James Porter took the reigns as center director at the CMSC.  

Megan and Alex at an Honor's Night Way Back When

Megan on the Magellan in Character

     Megan has become indispensable at The Space Place as Bracken's right hand lady. She flight directs, supervises, creates content, writes missions, trains new supervisors, and generally does a bit of everything to keep the Center working. The Space Place's Nighthawk simulator is her baby. She is restoring it bit by bit to make it space worthy for future missions.  

Megan was The Space Center's Director for One Year

Megan, The Space Place's Right Hand Lady

     Megan is an excellent flight director and will do an amazing job at American Heritage School.  In addition to her work as a daytime field trip flight director, Megan will assist with the school's Voyager Club which meets Wednesday afternoons (when she isn't needed on the Voyager for Renaissance Academy's Voyager and Young Astronaut Clubs).  Megan loves to hear from her old Space Center friends so drop her a line to say hello and to congratulate her on her new position.

Bill Schuler, the Man Behind the Space Center's Display Case Rockets  

     Bill Schuler, the Man, the Myth, the Legend.  Space Center old timers know him as Admiral Schuler, the "by the book" Starfleet Admiral who haunted their overnight camp missions.  You know the guy, the one who spat out Diet Coke foam when stunned...... the Admiral who could spot a piece of lint in the carpet from twenty paces away.  Yes, that's him. Now you remember :)

     Bill Schuler has always been the Space Center's biggest fan and supporter and enthusiastically agreed to take on the job of managing the Center's lobby display case with a variety of different rockets both real and sci-fi for the guests to enjoy while waiting for missions or planetarium shows. 

      Yesterday I found Bill testing the shelf heights for a few new additions to the display.  Bill is meticulous when it comes to his models. He is a professional in that regard and has won many awards from the state plastic modeling organization. The display case has a few of the award winning models. 

      Did you know that the Starbase Williamson sign above the stairway leading from the lobby to the simulators has an Easter Egg tribute to Admiral Bill Schuler?  Look closely.....

     Bill is pointing it out just in case you've not noticed.  There are similar tributes in the sign for other long time Space Center fixtures: Dave Wall, Mark Daymont and Lorraine Houston.  Thank you Bill for everything you do to make the Space Center a magical place of learning. Thank you for all the past years of service, all 31 of them!  You've done much to further our mission of "Creating a Space Faring Civilization".  Today we all salute Admiral Bill Schuler!

Imaginarium Theater

The Week's Best Video's From Around the World Edited for a Gentler Audience

The Space Center's Newest Staff. The Upstairs and Downstairs People at the Space Center. Mikey's First Falcon Mission. Amberly is the New Voyager Club President. Imaginarium Theater

 

     Sadly, I don't know anything about Kate because the planetarium people are the upstairs people and the simulator people are regulated to the downstairs.  Upstairs people have been known to cross the Great Divide from time to time to discover the source of the low rumblings from the simulators that can be felt in the planetarium from time to time. You'll seem them cautiously descend the staircase to Starbase Williamson one step at a time unsure of what they may see.  I've seen a few who wear masks "just in case" and others will hold a perfumed handkerchief to their nose to protect themselves from mysterious ethers.  I've heard rumors that they call us "PaleSkins" due to the simulator staff's rare exposure to the sun. 
       Happily we all welcome Kate to the Space Center family and ask that she drop a treat of something over the staircase from time to time to remind us that we are remembered.  Do it out of the kindness of your heart, or for no other reason, do it to watch the feeding frenzy which ensues when a tasty tidbit comes our way.

Mikey's First Falcon Flight

     Mikey W. took his first group of paying customers for a 2.5 hour hop around the galaxy last night in the Falcon. The Falcon is the Not Federation starship at the Space Center. The crews of the Falcon scour the galaxy for bargains both big and small and I'm sure Mikey led them to some great deals over their time with him. Rumors are that they walked away with hard to find bathroom fixtures including a walk in tub and gold platted toilet. 
     Mikey is the former president of the Space Center's Voyager Club. He resigned his position once he received his Navy Blues.  We are all very proud of Mikey. He is a good friend to all, and that includes the Upstairs people.  He was even received in their Star Temple (planetarium) for a brief moment to catch a glimpse of the Star Priestess herself, Brylee Perry.  It was too much for him. Upon his return to the Starbase, he required the services of the Cassini's Medical Sick beds to recover his strength.

Amberly is the New Voyager Club President

     Yesterday morning, the Voyager Club's Leadership Team met to both accept Mikey W's resignation as president and approve Amberly P., as the Club's new president.  The vote was unanimous.  Those present were, Jack H, Eavie W., Thomas R., Amberly P., and Advisor Mr. Williamson.  Oliver U., was unable to attend. 
      Amberly took no time issuing new presidential decrees.  
                 1.  Eavie and Thomas were assigned to plan and stage the Club's socials. It was noted that Eavie is the Club's well know party animal. Thomas, on the other hand, may appear meek and mild, but give him a glass of Mt Dew and watch the caffeine kick in!
                 2.  Jack was assigned to create a series of videos to accompany the Volunteering Handbook. The videos will help new Voyager Volunteers transition from Explorer to Volunteer. His first video will take us deep into the jungle we call the Costume Closet to discover what fantastic creatures dwell within.  We're anxious to read his script.  Watch the Google Classroom for opportunities to be extras in his film.  Rumor has it that he has already purchased a "Director's Chair" with his name on the back.  I'm told he already has a megaphone and is using it in his neighborhood shouting "Cut" to the birds in the backyard. 
     The club is also exploring opportunities where the Voyagers from the Space Place at Renaissance Academy, and the Voyager's at The Discovery Space Center at American Heritage can mingle and get to know the Voyagers at The Space Center.  After all, we are all after the same thing - to create a space-faring civilization and to provide support to our Space Centers.

Look What I Found in the Parking Lot

     Hats off to James Porter, Director of the CMSC, for his taste in signage for the Space Center's parking lot.  

Imaginairum Theater

The Week's Best Videos From Around the World Edited for a Gentler Audience

Scott Wiltbank is the New Set Director of the Phoenix. Posts from the Past - Changing a Young Tween's Attitude With the Magic of the Space Center. Mikey W., is the Falcon's Newest Flight Director. Imaginarium Theater

  

Scott Wiltbank Receiving the Phoenix Microphone from Jon Parker

     Attention, prepare for an important announcement. Hear Ye, Hear Ye.  Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears.  Dominus Jameses Maximus Porterillius decrees that Scott Wiltbank be appointed Set Director of the Starship Phoenix; so let it be written, so let it be done (forgive me blending my histories, it was done for effect). 
    In a ceremony stretching back to the earliest days of the Space Center, Jon Parker, Director of Simulations at the Christa McAuliffe Space Center, handed the ship's flight director microphone, spittle and all, to the new Set Director. Scott accepted the microphone signaling his acceptance of the calling and his willingness to steer the ship along the course set by the Silver Perry's hard work and firm hand on the rudder.  
    Scott is an outstanding gentleman, scholar, and good judge of science fiction simulator stories. He is also an award winning Flight Director, having won best FD for the summer camp season. `I did my best to defeat him the summer I worked as a Cassini FD but my best efforts fell short.  
     

     Scott first came to my attention back in 2015/2016 as a young black shirt volunteer. At one Honor's Night in July Scott received both his Odyssey Pin from Devin and his Galileo Pin from Erin; an amazing achievement.  I was concerned the weight of the pins would rip the shirt right off his back.   

     You wonder how a young teen could accomplish so much, then I found out.  Yes, there is talent present in Scott's small frame, but Scott has one other quality that helped him over the finish line in both simulators, Scott is an excellent kisser upper to the Set Directors.  Just look at the homage he paid to Erin at the ceremony. 

     The current Voyager Club members should take note and follow Scott's example when looking for a Phoenix Pass.  Pay homage, laugh at all his jokes (stupid or not), hold the door for him, warm his flight director's chair, and repeatedly tell him that he is the best flight director ever.  If you're really brave and willing to risk the wrath of Jon Parker, tell Scott he is a better flight director than the Almighty Jon.  It will earn you a pass, but if word gets back to Jon, that Phoenix pass will be your last :)  If you doubt me, just look at the picture of Jon handing Scott the Phoenix microphone. Look at Jon's face.  Look at the fear in his eyes. Look at Scott's face. Look how confident he appears.  Could Jon's position be in jeopardy? Stay tuned for further developments. 

​Mr. Williamson   

From the Troubadour's Archives. February 2008. A Young Tween's Attitude Changes About the Space Center  

    The original Troubadour Blog, with all the posts stretching back to 2008, is available to everyone by invitation. I've closed it to the general public because of two incorrect copyright warnings that I don't have the energy or time to fight. If you'd like access to the first Troubadour, please send me an email request.  SpaceCampUtah@gmail.com
     On slow news weeks I find it good to go back to old posts and reread good posts from the past which remind us of our heritage and our mission.  The following post comes from February 2008. Please give it a read.  For current space center staff and volunteers, it is a reminder of the magic we do day in and day out.

  

 

The Right Wing on the Voyager's Bridge.

February 24, 2008

Hello All,
     I want to thank our staff and volunteers for another successful week at the Space Center. March is upon us. I want to remind our volunteers and staff that the March Call for Volunteers is posted. Please look over the working schedule and send your requests by email. I’d like to get the working schedule out to everyone by week’s end. March is looking to be a busy month so we will need All Hands on Deck!
     I’m trying to put two supervisors on every Voyager and Magellan mission. Our Central School volunteers are filling many positions left open during the week. It seems our older volunteers are having a difficult time getting here on weekdays. I’m guessing the cause is two fold: busy schedules and the ever rising cost of gasoline. Our local Central School volunteers all live within walking distance of the Space Center. They enjoy working but are young and need supervision. Two supervisors on the larger simulators will help provide them with the supervision and training they require to become better volunteers.

     You’ll notice an increase in the number of schools coming for after school field trips. March, April and May are full of school’s arriving at 2:00 P.M. and leaving at 6:00 P.M. They are sending two classes each day. This means an addition ‘full’ field trip of classes, Starlabs, and missions. Our daytime staff will need your full support. It isn’t easy teaching four of everything each day. The repetition can be mind numbing. I’m confident we will do exceptionally well because we have high standards and an awesome staff who always do their best to give our visitors the best field trip in Utah. Hats off to Sheila, Aleta, Lorraine, Metta, Megan, Stacy, Bracken, Jordan, Jon P., Brooklyn, Christine, Marc, Kim, and all the Central School 5th and 6th grade volunteers.
     I’m reminded of something I heard from a young lady last week. A sixth grade class was finishing their training on the Voyager Bridge. The Right Wing Flight Officer was looking around the Bridge impatiently. She had mastered the look of a bored teenager - not bad for a 12 year old. She raised her hand.
     “Is this all we’re going to do is sit here?” she asked. “I’m getting bored.”
     “Yes, all you’re going to do is sit here so I’ll guess your going to be bored.” I answered. I wanted to say much more. You can’t imagine the will power required not to say more. The words were at the tip of my tongue already formed, fueled, and waiting for launch. A couple consonants and a vowel hissed out between my clenched teeth but quickly retracted and swallowed.

     Her face collapsed into a production of distortions carefully rehearsed to convey extreme frustration at not being entertained. I could tell she needed something. My guess was her ipod - the pacifier of a new generation. This new generation goes from the pacifier in the mouth to headphones into the ears. I see ‘the young’ everywhere with wires running from their belts to their ears. Their brains seem to need constant noise and entertainment. The sounds of human voices and nature are no longer satisfying.
     Some teens have such a distant look on their faces it makes me wonder what they are listening to. I can only guess; “Breath in and Breath out. Walk. Stop. Breath in and Breath out. Walk. Stop. Breath in and breath out. Walk Stop. Chew gum. Breath in and Breath out. Walk Stop. Chew Gum.”
I turned from the young lady and continued to work with the other children that had real questions. In the back of my head I wondered what her opinion would be of the mission.
     I started the mission. Her face was square in the center of one of my TV monitor. I watched her reactions as the mission progressed. Tex’s speech did nothing for her. Her head rested on her hand. Her elbow was firmly planted on the desk. Her eyes were fixed upon the black ceiling. I wondered if she was praying for deliverance. Soon I was lost in the mission and lost interest in tracking her reactions. At the end of the mission I remembered to look at her again.
     “That was awesome!” I heard her telling her friend from across the room.
     “Did you see...........? I saved the ship by............ My heart was beating so fast.........” She went on and on as she left the bridge. I sat back in my chair and began shutting off equipment. You know you’ve done a good job when you can change a teenagers opinion from “This is stupid” to “This was awesome!” So..... several days late and in the quiet of my own home I stand and take a bow to the four walls of my living room. I’ve conquered a teacher’s Mount Everest.
     Another week starts. Hundreds of kids are getting ready for the ultimate field trip. If you are one of those kids I want you to know that we are ready for you. We’ve been here 17 years training and preparing for you - just you. My thanks to the students and teachers that visit us weekly. My thanks to a great staff and volunteers that make the Space Center the magical place it is.

Ad Astra!
Mr. Williamson

Michael W., is the Falcon's Newest Flight Director at the Christa McAuliffe Space Center

     We call him Mikey, I thought I'd include that for those who only know him as Mikey :)  Mikey is a diligent worker and once he set him mind on becoming a Falcon flight director there was no stopping him.  I'm happy to report that Mikey's hard work and preserving paid off. Last week he was awarded his Navy Blues and joined the few, the proud, the chosen.  He is in the Flight Director's Guild. 

     With the Navy Blues in hand, Mikey stood and solemnly spoke the Flight Director's Pledge.
     "I pledge to honor the training and craftsmanship of the flight directors who trained me. I pledge to set an example of professionalism to my staff, volunteers, and crew. I promise to lead and guide my crews by adhering to the missions' goals and objectives. I promise to honor the pioneering spirit of the first ship Voyager by continuing to learn and improve upon my craft. These things I will do until I lay my microphone down."  

     After taking the oath, new Flight Directors are given a membership card and the key to the Space Center's Executive Washroom.

     Receiving a key is the ultimate goal of every space center volunteer and staff. There is a reason many of you don't know about this. When you've earned it, it will be made known to you. And don't go bothering the flight directors about its location.  They'll only act stupid and say they there is no such place and they don't know what you're talking about. They may even try besmirching my good name and tell you I embellish the truth and spread false information here in the blog!  Lies I tell you, All Lies.
     Congratulations Mikey on this goal met and one item off your bucket list. 
     With Mikey gone, the Voyager Club at the Christa McAuliffe Space Center is without its president.  Voyager Club leadership positions are only for those in the 'volunteer' category.  Once receiving a paycheck, Voyager Club leaders must resign. This leaves an opening in the club presidency which will be filled very soon.  Watch for more news on the matter in upcoming posts.

Imaginarium Theater

The Week's Best Videos From Around the World Edited for a Gentler Audience