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Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Mickey Fired! And The Space Center's New Autosmile Braces.

Hello Troops,
The DuMouse clan sat anxiously waiting for the weekly Friday evening MouseNetwork replay of Steamboat Willy, Mickey's first on screen performance. The DuMouses live between the walls of a wonderfully restored Victorian home on the corner of Fifth and Elm in Wonderland. A human family named Dumont purchased the home ten years ago.

"Quiet," shouted Mrs. DuMouse, "the show is about to start." She searched the sea of little mouse eyes for her youngest. "Wally, get the cheese out of the ice box. Let's have a treat."

"We interrupt this broadcast to bring you a special bulletin." The announcer's voice was somber, reflective of the news he was about to read. The Mouse family froze. They knew whatever it was had to be serious for the MouseNetwork to interrupt a playing of Steamboat Willy.
"This just in, Mickey Mouse was fired as Disneyland's Goodwill Ambassador. Apparently several campers attending a mission at the Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center in Pleasant Grove were overheard telling the director that the Space Education Center was 'better than Disneyland'." The announcer paused to choke back his emotions. "A Disney informant not wanting to be identified said that Mickey was warned his job was on the line if anything like that was said again."

The picture on the screen switched from the news reader to a picture of Mickey, outside of the Magic Kingdom.

"Oh how the mighty have fallen!" gasped Mrs. DuMouse.
"Say it isn't so Mama!" Dora DuMouse sobbed.
"I'm afraid its true. Poor Mickey, reduced to begging on the street." Mrs. DuMouse's countenance grew dark - her eyes sinister. "Curse that Space Education Center," she mumbled under her breath. "They'll get theirs someday."

I realize not everyone who comes to the Space Center's agrees, but two people told me yesterday that the Space Center was better than Disneyland. As many of you know, I'm one of the world's greatest Disney fans, so hearing that causes my chest to swell with such pride it nearly busts my buttons. I don't necessarily agree with the comment, but I'm happy that there are many who sincerely believe it.

The Space Education Center is my 2nd Happiest Place on Earth! The Disney Parks will always be my number 1, but thank you to all of you that believe differently. You're all awesome.

The Autosmile Brace

I found these awesome Autosmile Braces while Christmas shopping online and decided to purchase a set to be used by the Space Center's staff. Finally someone was creative enough to realize that not everyone can look happy all the time when coming to work - hence the problem we have at the Space Center.

There are days forcing the corners of my mouth upwards to reveal a convincing smile requires hydraulic power my cheek muscles cannot muster. On days like that, usually caused directly or indirectly by the Dementress, I must rely on others to stand as welcoming and warm in my stead. Lorraine is one such person. She had her smile tattooed onto her face several years ago just for the Space Center. I admire her dedication, but couldn't bring myself to do the same until last week.

After working a very difficult mission with a captain who rarely left her chair and spoke with such a mousy voice no one could hear anything she said, my natural frown sagged into something entirely unnatural in appearance. I caught a glimpse of myself in the Phototon on the bridge. It was shocking.

"Your countenance has ventured into a menagerie of the macabre and the grotesque." Lorraine said as she pulled me aside to deliver the terrible news moments before we loaded the next field trip crew.

I looked at her tattooed smile. Mind you, up close you can see the artist's flaws, but from a few steps back, it looks entirely natural. "Alright, I'm going to do it. Make an appointment. I'll have the procedure."

Lorraine smiled. That's when I was reminded of another major flaw in a smile tattoo. "Lorraine, remember not to smile for real. The two tattooed corners of your mouth nearly close at the top right there under your nose. It almost makes a perfect circle."

"I forgot," she replied.

Thank goodness I discovered the Autosmile Braces before leaving for the tattoo parlor. A Space Center landmark has been saved. My natural frown can continue to instill fear anytime I wish (necessary when you're the boss. The staff need to see me when I'm not a happy camper).

Staff and volunteers, the Autosmile Braces will be kept just inside the Voyager's Stage loading door. Pick one up as needed for those tough days. And please remember to disinfect when finished BEFORE you hang them back on the hook.

Remember, we always have a smile for our guests, whether natural, unnatural, or mechanically produced :)

Mr. W.
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