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Sunday, July 10, 2016

CMSEC Honor's Night (held in the Morning. Stranger Things have Happened). Theater Imaginarium.

The Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center Honor's Its Staff and Volunteers at Honor's Event
Disclaimer: The Troubadour brings you news from all the Space Centers inspired by the original USS Voyager. Trust our news to be fair, impartial, at times confusing, and nearly accurate. We like to season our offerings with a spray of imagination to give it just the right flavor for tired eyes.
     
     More than fifteen years ago I realized a need to pay tribute to the Space Center's faithful staff and volunteers. Thanking them for their service wasn't enough. Giving them a candy bar or two was better because younglings love sugar, but it too wasn't enough. Rewarding them with gift cards to University Mall, Provo Mall, and WalMart took us nearly there, as long as I included the gushing "Thank you's" and frequent visits to the gift shop's sugar cabinet. What took us over the top was the first ever Honor's Night where we could celebrate the time and effort given to keep the Center running and the ship's flying.
     Here we are several years later witnessing another Space Center Honor's program under the command of Mr. James Porter, Director and Admiral Supreme of all space forces at the Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center.
     Let's see who was on June's docket for recognition 



     Devin (shirt and tie) is the Odyssey Set Director.  Scott is the teen in black. Scott proudly wears his simulator pins on his collar. Each pin represents weeks if not months of work. Last week Scott received his coveted Odyssey Pass and pin that accompanies it.  With his pin firmly attached to his shirt Devin may now sit in the Odyssey Control Room without asking for permission.  In the Odyssey world the sitting privilege is equivalent to an office worker getting the key to the executive washroom.   


  
    Scott was invited to the front of the room once more by Mr. Porter. Waiting in a most regal red was Galileo Set Director Erin. She was prepared to bestow another honor on the humble and deserving Scott IF and only IF he demonstrated proper etiquette.You see Scott's training in action. There are several phrases used to describe this kind of crawling behavior; however, in Scott's defense, a moment of reverence for holy personages can yield positive results.  Getting his Galileo Pass and pin was a small price to pay for surrendering his dignity. 

  
     Scott is constructed around a small frame. There isn't much meat to the kid.  I worry about potential back problems.  If you examine the photo closely you'll notice how Scott's right shoulder sits lower than his left. This is due to the weight of the multiple pins he wears. Another problem was discovered when he attempted to return to his seat.  The added grams and lowered shoulder caused him to slightly veer to the right as he struggled to navigate a straight course.  Mr. Porter suggested a easy solution. The pins were evenly distributed on both sides of his collar. The tendency to circle was illuminated and replaced with a hunched back causing a younger volunteer to mention his striking resemblance to a vulture.


     Lindsey earned her Odyssey pass and pin from Set Director Devin.  Certain smells bother Lindsey. Devin's aftershave is one of them.  Devin enjoys peculiar scents not normally associated with a man of his age.  Wednesday was Devin's Lilac Vegetal day. Odyssey staff and volunteers assigned to Wednesday's usually come to work with a handkerchief liberally doused with something manufactured in the 21st century to mask the Vegetal pong. 
     Devin apologized afterwards and promised to make sparing use of his Wednesday application in the future.   

Lilac Vegetal can always be found at the finest Diagon Alley shops


 Katy also earned her Galileo pass and pin.  Katy is a hard worker and a favorite of Erin. This is not to say that Scott isn't also a favorite, but there are various degrees on the favorite spectrum. Congratulations Katy!



     The folks in the photo above proudly display their Apprentice patch. I believe you just need to be human, breathing, aware of your physical surroundings, literate, and potty trained to be given the Apprentice patch. Oh, I forgot... being able to tie your shoes was recently added to the list.  Mr. Porter finally cracked when Sam asked him for the fifth time to tie his sneakers during last week's space camp.  


      The next level in the volunteer and staff ranking system is Journeyman.  Journeyman status is given to those with five years of service at the Space Center. 




 

     Masters sit at the top of the social hierarchy.  One must have ten years of dedication to be called a Master of Disaster and Doctor of Doom. Jon Parker and Lorraine Houston guard admittance to this guild. If they notice someone approaching the ten year mark, and you're not on their good boys and girls list, unfortunate unexplained bad luck becomes your constant companion until sheer madness drives you away. Stay on their good side at all times.  



     These folks are called Starfighters. They've volunteered over 100 hours. Why Jon, Andrew, Christine, and James are in this photo I'll never know. They've been a part of the Space Center family since their first missions in diapers.  They must have a gazillion hours by now. 




     The folks above proudly display the Hitchhiker patch.  This means they've clocked over 500 hours at the Space Center.


      Brylee Perry earned a Darmok Trials patch. Brylee plays an important role at the Center. She works tirelessly behind the scenes making the other staff look good. Well done Brylee.




     Jon Parker received the finest gift anyone can receive in Space Center service - a genuine Lorraine Houston blanket.  I'm taking a guess, but I'm thinking you must have about 1,000,000 hours logged to even be considered for a Lorraine Houston blanket. Wow!  Such an honor bestowed on one so young despite the strange belts he wears.  Jon, the Space Center family applauds. It is an honor to get to work with you.  The knowledge of the ancients rests within you. Guard it well.  

Mr. Williamson

Theater Imaginarium  















      
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