Mr. James Porter, Director of the Christa McAuliffe Space Education Center in Pleasant Grove respectfully begs your attention for an important announcement. The USS Odyssey and USS Phoenix simulators have new Set Directors.
A Set Director is responsible for his or her simulator. That responsibility includes maintenance (within reason taking into account their competence with tools and trustworthiness with electricity), story writing (within reason, taking into account their competence with the english language and political correctness), staff training (taking into account their social skills and overall general likeability).
The following outlines Space Center management. Something goes wrong. Mr. Porter yells at the Set Director. The Set Director yells at the flight director. The Flight Director yells at the staff. The staff yell at the volunteer. The volunteer goes home and kicks the dog. The dog bites back. The volunteer's hand grows septic with infection. Massive amounts of antibiotics are administered through a drip IV. Fifty percent of the time the hand is saved.
Let's meet the new Set Directors.
Devin Sudwicks is the Grand Master of the Ancient Order of the Odyssarian Brotherhood. Natalie Anderson, a long time member of the Ancient Order, received a parchment scroll informing her that her presence was requested in the Odyssey at midnight. Arriving on time and properly cloaked, as all Odyssarians are, Natalie approached the Grand Master with the Light of Perikoi in hand. Devin gave the international signal calling all to silence. As they clutched the Odyssey's microphone - the chanting began. "Micro, Micro, Micro phone," the congregants mumbled audibly with reverence for the solemnity of the occasion. Thirty chants later the right of passage was complete. Natalie Anderson was official the new Grand Mistress of the Ancient Order of the Odyssarian Brotherhood. Devin retreated into the darkness - away from the light - starting an adventure to find meaning outside a simulated life.
Farewell Devin. May you find what you're looking for.
Jordan Smith accepted a call to serve an LDS mission. Before leaving, he recorded a short video where he passed the Phoenix microphone to his successor Jon Parker. In the last Honor's Night (actually it was held in the morning; a fact I shouldn't need to mention were it not for a few sticklers to detail who call The Troubadour's office on a regular basis complaining that our news carries extreme exaggerations which have been known to confuse the sarcastically challenged in the community) Jon received the Phoenix microphone from digital Jordan.
This change of directorship was unusual and unorthodox. It has never been done this way. Mr. Porter may have stepped too far from accepted norms. The Council of Space Center Norms has been notified. We are told they are considering their options and calling a meeting of the Norms to review the passing. This conclave will pass a ruling on its legality. Until their ruling is announced, we will accept Jon Parker as the acting Phoenix Set Director.
Congratulations! (I think)