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Tuesday, May 3, 2011

My Monday. How was Yours?

Hello Troops,
I waited all day for the 3:00 P.M. Phoenix private mission. I was excited to see the first use of the newly installed 'transporter' door. The time was at hand. The group arrived and paid. Nate met them in the lobby, bathroomed them, and brought them in for loading.

"Step right into the transporter," he said as he opened the side door, completely bypassing the new transporter. He shut the door and came around the closet to open the sliding door to let them into the bridge.

I was glad Jon and Kyle were not at hand to see what I saw. They worked from 5:00 P.M. Saturday to 3:00 A.M. Sunday installing the dark room door. How was their dedication rewarded? Nate bypassed the new transporter and opted for the traditional way of loading a Phoenix crew. Nate chicken out :)

"Nate why didn't you load through the transporter?" I asked. He stopped and turned to face me. He looked confused, as if I'd asked him to solve a complex calculus equation.

He held his forefinger to his chin as if to prepare me for something profound. "I didn't really know how?" he said.

Now don't get me wrong, Nate is a top notch volunteer and future flight director so if he is struggling with the complexities of a turning door then perhaps there are others out there in his situation.

I'll ponder yesterday's revelation and take decisive action. Expect a three week course in the proper use of a dark room transporter door. The course will include everything from the proper loading technique, the proper spinning technique complete with instructions on how to avoid the over use of the wrist muscles - which could lead to carpel tunnel syndrome. The highlight of the course will be a lesson on making believable energizing sound effects while transporting people into a ship using nothing more than your vocal chords and a pocket wazoo.

And Now a Thought from the Imaginarium's Help Desk.

Do you ever feel frustrated with family, friends, and school. Remember, we have people on hand to take your calls right after school for 20 minutes a day. Our people have been trained in saying "That's life, so get over it" in many different soothing vocal tones. My favorite is Ocean Breeze. It's spoken with fluctuating winded words punctuated with minor breath intakes mimicking the sound of sea gulls.

And how about this pick me up.....
Have several of these cards printed and staple them to your next math assignment. Next to the card write "I'm a fish out of water. What did you expect, an A? But you should watch me text. Everyone says I'm a genius with my thumbs and creative spelling"

And finally, from the Imaginarium's "Life's Precious Moments" Department

Isn't it amazing how quickly life takes you from the "You're so precious" stage to
"Where's my smokes?
"Did I leave them at home?"
"Are they in your purse?"
"I need my smokes."
"I've got to pee and here comes the bus."
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